i don't understand why I need to pee every morning before I've had any food or water. fluid moves through your system really quickly right? is more ending up in my bladder while I sleep due to food digestion / other processes somehow or is it just something about the time passed or circadian rhythm that makes my body decide to signal to me to pee?

I go so back and forth. one week I've decided I don't give a shit about anything and I just want to pass the time and subsist and the next I want to cry because I feel like I'm failing myself for not creating or doing anything of aesthetic value but I don't really cry so I'm just sitting there feeling restless wishing I could feel something more intensely th

https://www.cjthex.com/....
https://cjthex.com/...
stumbled across these really cute multimedia collaborative book report things(?) organized by a book club that some youtuber apparently does with their patrons

it's only 8:30pm but it's really foggy out already for some reason. walking around feels slightly eerie even though it's not even late. exciting!

honestly im not fine right now and I feel stuck

I don't really know how to square "factory farming is evil" with the fact that humans have been doing agriculture and animal husbandry for thousands of years

it's the new year babey

my new years 12:00 experience was driving home from work making a detour to get briefly on the freeway so I could see the fireworks the casino was doing right as they started while calling two friends on the east coast still awake for no reason while they played gd lol

scrabble is a nice way to spend time with my grandparents or sometimes just my dad, but I'm getting kind of tired of it as just a game. the most fun way to play and the most optimal way to play are not aligned

sometimes I think its a miracle that anything gets made at all