MYYYYYY BOY WE DONT SEEEE EACHOTHER MUCH

Just bought the car your grandma chain smoked Pall Malls in. Only 32k miles on this fine lady.

CONCLUSIONS

Liam Neeson is the world’s most publicized pants pisser and he acts as if it’s completey normal. I think we can all learn something from that.

reading erotica in braille must be a wild experience.

I’m surprised no one in NJ has shot down those drones for the copper wire yet. God damn flying treasure chests.

*slaps you in the face and exclaims GET IT TOGETHER OLD CHAP (transatlanticly)

The midwest is such an outdated term. That shits the middle east.

what do you sick ass dudes prefer? A chick with a big bagungo and no bim bims or one with no bulumbo and a really long grindle?

Who needs pussy when I can sit by the lake, rod in hand, hook on the line, bait on the hook and a 5 pound bass attached to my cock and balls.