Just got really light headed while stretching out the kink my neck. I may have had myself in a choke hold.

Dear Corey Hart: Stop hitting meaningless home runs right now. I need you in the 2nd half.

Holy fuck those were Spanish dominoes.

Saw 2 crabs eating a regal tang at Petsmart and am realizing how fragile life is.

THIS MOMENT IS SO IMPORTANT! Go Cubs!

Who wants to do some spicy food challenges? I need accomplices.

Thank you Jawbreaker for being Jawbreaker.

I can't stop thinking about that crepe...

Hey Noah. What's up. Lookin' good tonight.

I am HOLDing STEADY for a long weekend that won't turn AGAINST ME!