everyone is getting better but me?

Dreaming about death and think about it makes me feel… numb(?)
As I look at the blue sky tonight, I wonder, is this my turn? Am I ready yet?

Bangun pagi bagus, packing saat org lain tidur juga terserah, tp jgn berisik (pack&unpack pake plastik kresek) dlm waktu lama dong 😭

Berisik, aku nggak suka teman sekamar yg berisik

Firstly I admit that I miss them, I told them what I feel. Validation really helps. I tried to navigate my feelings -my energy-, to give the feeling some rest and move my focus to other things I (used to) enjoy. Reading & writing.

Better. I feel better after finishing something. Sense of achievement?

Just a few minutes ago, I saw a friend's post captioned,

"Everything will be okay again,
And you will feel like you again"

How to be present and enjoy things around?

I can't wait to sleep again and can't wait until its time to go home

Wake up and wanna sleep again