So, we were given an assignment for public speaking: one thing we would change about the world and why. There were a bunch of serious and well-thought out topics. I chose dragons.
what about dragons were you changing?
Oh no, just that we should have them.
My Extensive Planning And Notes.
perfection.
i also like the music man reference in there.
this is why we are siblings
Holy Shit
jesus
I mean, we didn't need to pick something serious. Just that everyone did. And I was just like so guys.
It has been a very stressful two weeks, with a lot of very important issues to address. And the speeches before me have all done that in a very mature fashion.
That is not the approach that I have in mind for you tonight.
And then came the music man and how we shouldn't be confused about some ill-tempered egomaniac who some people have confused for a monster, as he is not a dragon and that would be discriminatory.
Next, talked about pest control being a breeze and that ISIS would be toast (literally) in no time.
Through in a line about how airlines suck, and that as four movies of Jurassic Park have shown me, nothing ever goes wrong with intelligent, carnivorous reptiles are by your side.
Throw* in
I hope I lightened everyone's day up a little, thank you and good night.
But yes, thank you. I am always glad to entertain
Oh dude there's two dragon emojis?!
Ahem, yes, anyway.
you know, i had somehow assumed that trump was included in the "if we have dragons we will have fewer problems" portion of the speech instead of just as an introduction
same
ryan this is so good
it's a delight.
Originally he was, but the trump joke hit me while I was trying to brainstorm a topic and it just stuck.
And thank you
There should be an emoji there but it's not showing on my phone- anyway, seriously thank you 