Assumptions: after saw her passing by, I met the girl who I sat next to every WED, well she was wearing too few and so I gave her my clothing, 1. I don't feel cold at all 2. that was an act of friendship. Though, the following is foreseeable, she will probably tag me on ig tonight, and the one who ignored me will see it as well,

5.3 (? I won't deny that my heart ached again when I saw you and we didn't even greet each others, but what I can tell is, the pain is much lighter now, perhaps it's the merit of Sagittarius? when we finally decided, we act quick, we adapt quick, soon I believe I will recover

emmmm

5.2 maybe one day I will become the person I always wanted to be, and maybe, by that time I will finally be valued by others and her...If you manage to read this, you have my sincere thanks, after typing this I made clear of my condition, maybe someday I can finally let go? thanks, I truly appreciate that, thanks, and thanks

5.1 although today I am still submerged by sadness, and definitely not in a good mood to work, but as my rationale restored, I gain a new insight, what have I done to deserve this? not even able to eat? there are better characteristics within me, perhaps I shouldn't live for others but myself?

5.0 after crying I finally feel relieved, I talked to three friends today about this, it seems I need to give myself an explanation/answer for the affection of 1.5 year, yeah I could just confess to her my feelings all these time, though I don't see any chances that would result in happy ending

4.9 there's something to celebrate though, my first love is in a relationship in early-March, and I am actually glad to hear that, just I was not qualified to congratulate her, this morning the first thing I did was finally to congratulate her, and I guess I can finally put down my guilt after 8 years? she wished me well too

4.8 within this 24 hours, I talked to several best friends, it seems my way of loving someone is to quietly contributing to her, I am good at this but only at this, so what definitely happens is that my feelings will accumulate overtime, but not hers, its like I hang myself with her holding the rope but not aware of it...

4.7 later that night, I am thankful to a best friend as he offered me to his place and to freely express myself, which was only possible after alcohol. I woke up at 5:29am yesterday, its 24 hours from now