Final analysis is that he has/had a bad head cold that affected the pressure in his ears, and some pretty severe dehydration. I tried to suggest other tests (after all he has been to the ED lately more than he has the grocery store it seems) but was voted down. He came home that night.
Walmart doesn't have enough bubble wrap to wrap him in before I throw him in the cooler so I will eventually have to go to Home Depot for my supplies if he keeps this up.
If it is a bad head cold (sounds weird, but ok, I'm not a doctor) than I recommend Mucinex. I have very bad pressure and pain due to sinus stuff and I feel that does a good job.