They're always hard to write and I always sound weird in them

patpats.

To be fair, some of the issue is that we're pretty clearly in a transitional period between one version of the English language and the next.

A hundred years from now, what's currently considered formal English will sound as old-timey as Shakespeare and the King James Bible do now, I figure.

fair point

(I only hope that punctuation actually survives the transition mostly intact.)

(it particularly drives me nuts that not everybody uses question marks when asking questions anymore. There is a substantive difference between asking a question and deadpanning!)