flew to see parents from MD to NM for the first time in 5 yrs

mom is 70 and dad just turned 70 in october

learned last night my dad had a TSI 2 months ago which is basically a mini stroke that is a precursor to a grand

he’s lost cognitive function which i noticed on the phone without real context (i just assumed maybe age?), and in person i see he’s having trouble walking when like years ago he was the most spry person of the house and does all the lifting literally and then some

he’s in denial but also not compos mentes, so i can’t determine why he isn’t pursuing care but he’s always been a doctor hating conspiratory nut

like one way or the other in those regards

but what that means is basically he’s

gonna die????? lol

and soon. like probably next 5y

if he dies my moms housing and income and everything else will fall apart and i’ve been paying THEM rent since i was able to work.. only stopped when i moved out

the way they make their money is taking care of my moms 72yo sister who has brain damage from anorexia, drug abuse and alcohol abuse

but it’s a house of seniors taking care of seniors; my parents, tho great ppl and friends, are not good parents. i was not assured success in any conventional capacity and just got a bunch of mental illness that made me way more afraid of taking risks blah blah blah

this has nothing to do w my rp really cuz my pace is gonna be the same... Shit. but it’s a bit of an added burden in process and in FACT LOL

the point of this plurk is to share how i’m doing and what’s going on

but w the msg before last i realized ahahaha if ANYONE WANTS TO TAG while i’m on this “vacation” the reprieve would be ..... welcome...

cuz i’m home but i have close to no contacts and also it’s the holidays so even if i did they’re busy with their kids and all

granted everyone is busy rn, of course but ummmmmmmm

let me know i... guess..... and outside of surprise (even to me) fishing thanks for reading if u did. it’s 2:30am here and i’m just gonna go for a long walk in these adobe burbs and chainsmoke about my life

holidays are never a good time, they’re always gift wrapped reality checks

ending bullet of my power point presentation: wheeeeeeeee

poisonparfait: oh jaz

this sounds like so much and I'm so sorry

ty auto

u always clutch

if we wanna figure out characters to thread or if you wanna play some gartic phone or jackbox or w/e im around

or if you just need to scream abt shit

i’ll let u kno! after i’m done w this youtube sub catch-up and chainsmoking lol

tysm either way however it goes even if it doesn’t

yeah absolutely

ty for keeping us updated pal

i am always really happy to hear from you, and im sorry life is just. coming at you with railroad spikes

it does to all! it’s just my time i think

but how well i can handle that on my own... lol..

i'm so sorry and if there's anything i can do to help, let me know

ty all ; 3 ; actually just putting it out there where i have confirmation ppl have read helps a bit lol. knowin ppl have at least endured me ventin

also auto is your disco the same

i read this and i feel for you

man. oof. sorry. i know u in particular definitely would

ye hon

i can send you my cell # too if you need

ty lov