I think I'm just very fucking burnt out. The feeling is just like "I wish I was dead" despite not being suicidal and still being paranoid about everything. I'm laying on the ground in my work clothes currently. I let myself eat today, but when I remembered the type of food I ate, I regretted it.
Sobbing bc my mother made peanut butter fudge bc she cares about us but I wish she didn't. Also bc I used to have it more as a kid and now I don't even know who that is anymore
I feel slightly more rested but like I could sleep way longer if I had time, and still starting pretty low. Kind of like I did yesterday too. Thank you both tho
not really I don't get pto until June, but I did at least get a week off approved in early January for my race weekend. So even tho I'll still be physically exerting myself it'll be a bit of a break