because i'm always down for garrus fucking around on dating sites at 4 in the morning

HAHAHAHA FUCK

beautiful :, )

lmao i just have to mentally scream SHUT THE FUCK UP GARRUS while i'm writing him sometimes lmao

this is one of those times

Shepard: "GARRUS YOU HAVEN'T LOOKED LIKE THAT SINCE 2184, YOU FUCKING NERD."

"IT WAS THE BEST LOOKING PICTURE OF ME I HAD"

"WHAT IS YOUR OMNITOOL BROKEN?"

[sighs, shows off every other picture since also has shep in it]

lmao honestly wait i should do that

have garrus awkwardly cropping shepard out

FH)IRFETRETHE

IM

WHEEZING

YOU THINK I'M A COWARD

I'M DOWN FOR A THREESOME

that's it that's how we make the ot3 happen

shepard just like "put me in your tindr profile, i'll show up to the date"

HOWLING

honestly garrus would probably appreciate that "teach me how to humans shepard, i have NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING"

"Well you're already good at following orders, so we're halfway there."

wink wonk

LMAO

Okay, there, check the picture now lmao

WITH THE ALIEN FACE IM

DEAD

there is no shepard without vakarian, even on garrus's dating profile

tbh

thats why when thane saw garrus he wasn't that surprised like. it just makes SENSE

it's true tho, it's like fries and a shake - you crave the other when you only have one

SAGE NOD

oh Looma definitely needs to give him shit for this

LMAO please!!!

definitely gonna have her find it accidentally trying to message him about something else entirely

just forgets about what it was she even wanted to talk to him about and just hits him up like "so the fuck is this and why are your standards so low???"

Well, Looma, PULL UP A CHAIR...

but they're all so tiny and meant for tiny human insects D:

oh shoot i still need to tag looma

Her and shep will get on like a house on fire 🔥

Micabean: she's got the log up from July that got like one reply that I still need to get back too, oops but nothing more recent than that. So there's that or...I'll probably have her make an annoyed network post once the plot thing kicks off for the month

I meant to hit up the July thing originally, so if it's no bother to you I'll try to go back to that

like "hey how do I buy land outside the city before I kill the next person to shove a flyer in my face?"

no bother to me o/