PLEASE put a character in Sasha's story called Doctor Illuminati

SDGMADSS you know what, I fuckin will

I'm curious now.

Okay, so. Dr. Illuminati prescribed me a sleep aid, and it doesn't... actually aid sleep. It's basically useless. I tried doubling it and it still did basically nothing. So I'm still plagued by the death of sleep as a concept.

The problem is that while I was trying to get a sleep aid, he crossed a big line imo (I'll explain in a second) and I am not going back to see him, because I don't think I can without walking in and picking a huge fight before I even sit down.

Good news is, my case manager uuuuuh responded to this by telling me she's not surprised and describing him as "an old man with a terrible bedside manner who probably should have already retired."

Which was sort of thrilling.

omfg

bless your case manager

your case manager is a bamf

I love her, she is amazing?

Anyway the issue is basically that Dr. Illuminati, I guess pissed off by my (sleep depriviation + disorganised speech related) inability to articulate what my problem was in not sleeping, turned around and fuckin prescribed me religion/spirituality, and told me my problem was that I didn't have a purpose.

The term "mind garden" was used. He recommended a specific book by a specific pastor.

big nope

you don't need drugs you need the opiate of the masses

(i am kidding)

He told me I needed a purpose multiple times, because I made the mistake of telling him that no, I don't believe my life has a purpose.

Bear in mind, guys, I am intermittently delusional and the last time I had a fuckin' purpose, I was basically the christ/antichrist of global warming and harbinger human extinction. That is a terrible recommendation and also SUPER NOT HIS BUSINESS?

There are a billion reasons why that was crossing a line tbh, that one is just extra exasperating to me

Anyway he also didn't like my use of technology to keep myself occupied and deal with intrusive thoughts or the occasional unpleasantness of being ambiently psychotic. Phones are bad and technology is evil.

efinitely needs to retire

Well, she's put in to have me moved to another doctor immediately, and in the meantime I just gotta put up with no-sleep brain fugue. Which is fine, I'd rather wait and have a psychiatrist who isn't...... that.

She was also unimpressed with the diagnoses he VERY BEGRUDGINGLY put in my chart, I've never in my life seen such a "what the fuck is this shit" face on a real human.

agreed he needs to retire

stop putting your own prejudices on your patients, dude

Agreed, because damn.

also mind garden always makes me think of Mr. Rodgers

Mister Rogers Remixed | Garden of Your Mind | PBS Di...

He wanted me to plant more positive thoughts in mine so that it would, I guess, magically improve my intrusive thoughts or delusional fixations.

because that's definitely how that works

It's the kind of thing that works a lot better for anxiety or depression than, you know, my kind of problems. If positive thinking cured or ameliorated the schizophrenia spectrum, we'd probably know by now.

yeah I was gonna say

that's new-ager talk

....if positive thinking was a cure-all I wouldn't have chronic depression. that shit is unhelpful as all fuck, christ. I'm glad you're getting a new doctor

this the same guy that wanted you to attend anger therapy?

akibara IT IS.

oh my god I didn't know he was also the one who made that boneheaded decision

LMFAO this man has been behind basically every bad decision wrt my treatment for like.... 2-3 years

fuck

So anyway good riddance

omfg

yeah, byeeeeee

lmfao fuck i hadnt known that part

bye fucko

GOOD RIDDANCE TO BAD TRASH