...TMW your ex-boyfriend keeps talking like he still wants you back... 
Dude. Dude. Need I remind you that YOU broke up with ME years ago? And the factors involved have not changed in your favor since that time?
But he wants to "cuddle to a movie" tonight, and he still calls me pet names and says he misses my hair and lips, and I'm like "DUDE."
"But sometimes patience pays off." ...if you're waiting for me to take you back, you will be waiting the rest of your life, sir.
Like. IDK how many times I can call you "dude" and "bro" before you realize you are permanently friendzoned.
It's been literally almost 6 years since we broke up.
Holy shit boy, give it up already
Like, IDK if he's actually wanting to get back together or just have his cake and eat it too...? Or just "teasing" or what.
Lordy, I'm too old and too ace for this shit.