what an experience

I always think I am going to enjoy being high at con and that is never the case, man

I am genuinely starting to feel like I am too bad at not being in control to enjoy weed. :T which is sad and seems kind of... opposite what most people tell me weed should do

but the last few times I've gotten high I have ended up having tiny amounts and then.... really wigging out.

and it's all been good stuff from people I trust so I dunno why that is.

I just always hear people say that it helps their anxiety and stuff but for me it basically just brings my chaotic inner voices out and makes me feel really self conscious?

that could also be because I tend to be around people who aren't high when I am, though. idk.

I've kind of resigned myself to not having weed anymore since lately it has just really fucked with my POTS

It does the same to me. Just increases the chance for an anxiety attack. Though it sometimes helps if you only think positive thoughts and have on some music you really enjoy