everything is gross

nv x garrus is dumb cute, nv x ryan is dumb cute, nv x wh is dumb cute, when did my life become this

omg you left out pilot

you know what would be even better? if he could fucking get his head out of his ass

HAHAHAHAHAHA

......noh-varr, not pilot

i'm sorry bootside your timing is either impeccable or terrible

(nv and ryan is especially cute tho wtf. i thought nv and garrus was sugary enough...)

i have the best timing

all that ass and he still can't get his head out of his own

It might be very difficult for NV...

(they are, but ahahahah that's only because ryan is his super low-maintenance boyfriend...........literally gives him scraps, gets tons in return)

omg burn

i am eagerly awaiting the day ryan realizes he could get so much better and goes like 'i don't have to put up with ur wishy-washy crap, goodbye!!!!!'

Noh-Varr basically

omg.

noh-varr is tinier than i remember

lmfao god i am so sorry IT'LL BE A LONG-ASS TIME

he is a literal golden retriever that's all like OMG YOU WERE GONE FOREVER BUT IT'S OK PET ME when you've been out too long

i mean he wants to take care of ryan but he doesn't really....respect him much like

ryan is like a pet, basically

hahaha god don't tell him that... or at least not the respect part

he'd be ok with the rest of it but he worries that noh thinks he can't handle himself

NV is very much convinced that Ryan needs a least a bit of coddling, sorry Ryan.

well emotionally he definitely does need a degree of it to feel cared for tbf

But that's ok because NV is totally happy to protect him!! and take care of him! and pet his fluffy hair. (but not actually, you know, relate to him on an emotional level because what is deep-seated

emotional constipation)

noh, they make pills for that now

as long as he's still getting affection that's fine by him