I feel that if I go, being so long out of the dept and academia (4.5 years) that I will be totally out of my element.

I don't look forward to discussing how I failed at my PhD, after so many supported me and put their faith in me.

But it could be a good chance to network, and eventually get out of a job I disdain and maybe at least into teaching a class or two.

It would also be great to see my old profs, who I still look on as some of the finest people it has ever been my privilege to know.

nods youfeel diminished but if you do not go you will always feel diminished.

Throw in a handful of natural social awkwardness to boot.

I can understand the conflict. If you can avoid the PhD topic (gently steer towards other chatter) I think this would be a benefit to you. Academia never forgets and often forgives, is my experience!

t'were well it were done quickly

www.plurk.com/CeejayWrit... , knowing these fine folks, it would likely be no issue that the PhD attempt didn't work out. If I avoided the topic, it would be to avoid feelings of personal shame.

Then go - be with your peoples!

I think you would get a lot out of going. Don't give up the chance to reconnect with good folk. Your path has diverged from what you & they expected, but you're not a failure.

Go and get the best out of it.

clear the air.

Some very good feedback here! Thank you. I think I will go.

Yay! scoots you