there's this girl who i went to school with for 1 year in 4th grade who apparently died today.

she had a pretty sever neurological degenerative disease for the entire time i knew her.

I feel bad that she died, but like everyone is posting these heartfelt statuses, and all i feel is "oh, that's a shame"

am i a bad person?

I don't think so, especially if you haven't spoken to her in a long time.

There isn't that much to be done if you didn't know a person very well. We all feel it when it's someone close, and when it's strangers, we usually feel something but not much, instinctively. In-between it can

get really murky.

I mean it was pretty well known that she would make it to maybe 25 at most cause of the disease, so i can't say it was even unexpected. I feel very meh about it.

That makes a difference too. Personally, with things like that, I always mentally brace myself because I feel like it will help me understand it and grieve better when it happens.

I suspect a lot of people prefer to just never think about it. To each their own, I guess.

true. I mean I guess I've never really felt particularly strongly about death in general unless its someone close to me.

its kinda odd cause i've had 2 aunts die (one maternal one paternal) and I was really only upset by the former's death.

its weird that it really doesn't phase me except in like 2 situations.

especially cause im over emotional about tons of stuff.

It can be a little weird but I honestly think that it's just different in every situation.

Like I said, I mentally prepare myself for this stuff and have done it in the past for people who have died or who will die. It's a little grisly and I don't enjoy it, but when my grandmother died unexpectedly,

it was such a shock that it really changed the way I think about it. Even then, the way I grieve is to just be left alone and to do something and remember the person honestly, and that doesn't always fit with

how people expect you to be.

That's my major thing. I want to remember people honestly, not some glorified version of them where they did no wrong.

at my grandpa's funeral, we told stories about what an asshole he could be. Turns out, a lot of them were pretty funny in retrospect.

You know, that's the way I'd love it when I die... I'd want people telling stories about some stupid things I'd done and laughing their heads off.

Grief is a very personal issue. Some people handle it openly and prefer to be with others. Some deal with it on their own quietly.

i know you sing a lot at funerals, so you must see all kinds of grievers, am i moderately normal.

?

And preparation plays a BIG key. When my dad died, I knew it was going to happen. I was sad, but it didn't hit me really hard. At least not for a while. However, others have just crushed me.

You're distanced from the situation, so I think your reaction is totally normal. Now if you went to school for 6 years, or maybe went to high school together for 3-4 years, that might be a different case.

true, it was after all only like a month ago that one of my hs friends ODed on ketamine. That case was super different.

I had someone I went to school with for 9 years who passed away a few years ago. Thing is, I hadn't heard a thing from her for nearly 20 years, so it was just "Oh god... I'm so sorry to hear that."

I had someone I knew for about 2 years in college who passed away... even though I knew he was really sick, it was just a shock because it was RIGHT THERE. Hell, I had to tell one of our professors about it.