i just realized this upcoming year, i'm going to be 26. my GOD. why am i old? 
on the bright side, i dont look 26.
RUDE
I'm 29 so. :|
xD
what no
i am a little thing
TRADE ME
little things should say little
no
;A;
come onnnn
no
but apparently what strangers say
i look 18
or 20
so that's good!
I'm 28, so you're not old yet. XD
god... im trying to imagine myself 40. i just... i cant do it
this TINY LITTLE PERSON BEING 40
i'm like 5'1
JUST... crying
actually i think im fucking shrinking
like before i needed a ladder to change showtimes, then suddenly i didnt need to.
and now again, i struggle to get it even on my toes
/pets
cries in hands
Oh, you are older than Jade and I
but you are always such a bitty in my head
because i am bitty!!! 5'1 and i have a tiny voice that's not threatening at all
and i bet when my gallbladder is taken out, i'll shrink more and lose more weight
so i'll be super tiny
;~; does that make me extra old...
hell even my beetle VW is kinda big on me and the car is tiny itself
Calm down gramma
diamondswords: WOW SHUT UP GRANDPA BEAR
it's funny cause a lot of you that are younger than me, i feel are way more mature than me and i'm older.
well, i know i feel like that with jade, at least
and with manda too
i feel manda is more mature than me
and duski
What are you doing gramma it's time for your nap.
i can ACT MATURE... if my emotions aren't in the way
LEVI, SHUT UP.
YOU GO TAKE A NAP
killkinds THIS MIGHT BE MEAN but I never would have expected that??? man, and I like having someone so close to my bday /amused
that is more
dry-spell widow
instead of mature
/winks
FUCK YOU, JADE. I DO NOT ACT LIKE I'M 15.
IM WAY MORE ADULT THAN THAT. YOU'RE JUST SAYING THAT TO PISS ME OFF, AS FUCKING USUAL
I have 16 yo's on my list who act like they are 20, and yes....I would have pegged Tails at 19?
wait... WASN'T ONE OF THE QUALITIES -- no... i dont think you said mature.
....
well, Tails wants a Mistress after all~
that i do
i still want one
why dont i have on eyet
*one
/snerk
.. wait.. I FEEL LIKE IM MISSING SOMETHING WITH THESE SNRKS
but hey, you are not at the upper end of my list? it goes 16-41 rn, I think
27 and will be 28 in a few months
Do you, huh~
....
i feel so confused all the sudden
eh?
and li, i didnt think you were 28 at all
oops?
its a compliment!
don't remind me of craddle robbers
my sense of humour is not work safe??? so sometimes I say things and then
belatedly remember
'Oh, they are still in their teens'
also, Litha only gets better with every year. and scarier? probably~
lol, my whole world is nsfw.
PEOPLE KNOW WHAT THEY WERE IN FOR WHEN THEY ADDED/BEFRIEND ME
and if they didn't know before, they know sooner than later LMFAO
seriously, my first plurk today was about tits
yup 
immediate boobies. 
of course, why do you think i'm always there?
LMAO
Tails, I added you on plurk
and the first day
everything was
NSFW
and I was just
making faces because I knew you from playing Maka
it is okay....I also said I would never be interested in anyone younger than I am
hahahaha screw me
hahaha
I don't normally care about age differences? the biggest I had was like 17 years
but b-being the first lesbian influence
not fun
12?
I did say that I had sex really early
i wonder how man brains i've broken. cause i know some people added me RIGHT when im going on about bondage/me wanting a mistress/ and spamming pictures of girls all tied up.
*many
and he owned the property next to ours? so I saw him often, but it was so squicky because his daughter was only five years younger than me
well clearly
the answer is to
get you a Mistress
or would that lead to more plurks???
hmmmm... :|a
seriously, why aren't you in Europe, that would make it easier to hook you up?? I know lenoug
iiiiidkk if it'll lead to more plurks
WELL I'M GOING TO EUROPE UM...SOOON-ISH?
29/12 you mean
17 was the age dif
MAKE SURE YOU END UP IN THE RIGHT STATE
and I shall hook you up
but that means you still have to wait
it's weird that i'm the oldest cause i've always been with people who are older.
why are you even surprised Jade. I am good at doing odd things?
also, why some of my first experiences were ridic kink, because he fancied both me and my good friend? and was friends with her boyfriend
*kinky
so you had foursomes? three somes?
Today? I am too but when I was that age I was just ??? oh he wants sex
well, sure
threesomes with her boyfriend watching
....s-sounds familiar
you know that you can, though
i cant do that
im way too possessive and jealous to do threesome anything. i dont even know how i survived that polygamous relationship i was in.
that was also the time I started drinking
that sure is Freudian (Tails are you fine with your plurk being hijacked? I can nap Jade into pp, too if she wants)
also uffff!!
i give no fucks
tricky? I think it was a factor, even though it's annoying because not all aces have troubled pasts
but I was uncomfortable and usually heavy on the booze
and the boys were on drugs? so it sure made me queasy, but I had no idea that not liking sth meant you should stop it?
so I just kept on
and felt ashamed later on. But I couldn't get an orgasm back then either (then again 12 )
well, my home was the same? my mother's room had no doors, and two of the sides were completely open
and she always mistreated her lovers? and I could/had to watch
so I was always weird about sex
and, looking back? boys were never my thing. when I was 12 I was crushing on this girl w/o realising???
boys are just....ugh.
we met when we were out drinking, and she was older too, but she took me on her lap, and patted my head for hours
(and Peter? that 29 yo? was around. as was her bf. and both were kind of weird but I had no idea why )
in any case, it did not help that I thought I had to take dick when it
not my thing
yesssssss
boys are not my scene. and I get very dominant with them?
even with Peter I was the one who topped in bed, despite having no idea what to do
he just...made me top? in a way?
boys are just.. i dont know. like i can kiss them but that's as far as i will ever do with a guy. i barely done anything sexual with them. -- well wait, i did ONE thing but i dont think i would count it
I did! and like, I can be amused? cocks are ridic soft!! it is almost, but anything sexual?? makes me flinch
whereas girls are just, less hairy and less - hmm, they don't make you feel pushed?
i think some cocks look nice? but then some look weird and then if i actually sit back and think if i could do something with them, most likely i wont.
and I think it's good to try things out! but, if it doesn't fit? then it doesn't
look?? they make me think of noses
just don't ask me why
LOL NOSES
do you do penetrative with your girls, Tails?
/no shame
no. because im still... working on trying to put my finger in.
i havent really came across a girl who will help me with that
hmmm! some people just don't like it at all
wait i lied. my first ex, tried but her nails were too fucking long and wont cut them
even those that aren't aces aren't
always into penetration?
my latest ex, she was going to but then i got sick and sex got put on hold a lot
LOL HI CHASE
Jaaaaade, we need to get Tails sex ed'ed
BUT I KNOW HOW TO HAVE SEX
but do you feel uncomfortable= even with one finger?
i... dont know?!
I don't think your half-assed things count...!!!! You need someone to rock your world, or rock someone else's !!
i've rocked lots of worlds
shut up, jade
are you okay with being the one who penetrates? or is it an all-around ugh? but why am I not surprised that you are not into it
it's MY PLURK
this plurk: Ny happened, Jade fingered her into it??? Tails was left bereft
...if people ever remember to do both
hahahaha me too
it's the truth tho
see, enjoying sex sounds confusing
cause even though my 1st ex hates my guts, she still goes around and says that im one of her best fucks. 
like, having sex and making someone enjoy it? sure
but, ugggh.
/snerk. Tails has a rep~
you bet your ass i do
how do you know jade?
been down there?
nope
okay shut your fucking mouth
i love when my plurk turns into sex when it started off about me being old.
best plurks
you need sex to stave off old age???
yeah, but it is so - endless mechanics, and things being complicated, and
/makes face
i thought you said
"you need sex to slave off old age??"
i was all "what.."
like, sex is meant to be fun!! and I have so many people tell me that they are sad I can't have an orgasm
or that I don't have a - libido
but it is just work to me. I am happy when someone can be all enthusiastic about sex! but it is like tallking about building mechanical wings for me
AHAHAHAHAA
oh Tails
that makes me sad too
raaaaawr, oh Jade~
oh hoooo
obviously you two need to get together
I am pretty sure that half of my plurklist thinks I am sexing you and Ava up anyway
so I am getting immense hilarity out of it anyway
.....that could only end in murder???
unless I cook for Jade
this plurk is making me miss sex
...I am the best asexual, ever.
people keep on saying that while I am around?? 'this made me miss sex'
and I am just. okay
/unsure???
hahhaha
are there no girls where you are Tails
EVERYONE IS FUCKING STRAIGHT
or if they are bi/lesbian girls
they already interested in someone
and i DOUBT they'll be into the whole mistress/pet thing
so my life is just a big ball of sadness and disappointment
do you live in the middle of buttcrack nowhere
oh wait
those towns are like
even kinkier
MY PLURKLIST IS SPECIAL????
but yes, they totally do
and them I am all
i guess???
how am I meant to seduce her from a different continent
and they are all
'Oh, do you guys have skypesex'
#legitconversationIhad
I WAS NOT AWARE THAT WE HAD THAT KIND OF IMAGE????
but you guys have chemistry and you keep on sayng these things
and all I think about you and plurk is zodiac stuff
most likely the chemistry
those are not code words
I think I even got asked if I was okay with you and Gee talking so much once
N-no, it is really hard on my feelings!!!!!
where is my d supposed to go now
MISERY
siiiiiiiiiiinks off
I got my sexy skypepartner stolen away by a teenage brit
/COUGHS mnsdb masdn,masd.as,d
AHAHAHAHA
'what is your rising sign again' means, what flavour lube do you want today
and moon in pisces is cunninglus I guess, because water sign
BUT WE ARE ALWAYS FIGHTING FOR IT so it is a pretty fixed thing
fixed signs would be 'are you breaking of bc of your teenage lover y/n'
heeeeeeey, didn't you always want a sexy rep with a random German
don't ask me, I think part of it that people always think I am flirting?? I am always the other woman, always.
but I was seriously waiting for them to ask about who is the top with us
sex was put on hold more than two days
cause of my gallbladder
and yes, according to someone else - she does
from other sources, she talks about how amazing i was. WHICH OF COURSE IS SO TRUE.
i am always amazing in everything ever
and when i mean by try, i meant like try to do it every day type of thing even though that would not work.
im probably focusing way too much on your last week here. cause i know the last week, we didnt had too much of sex because i was always in pain
and i would push you off every time you tried to make me have sex
and just moving around in general was PAIN
you did hump me like a dog
a dog in heat
fucking is always lovely and wonderful. except to those that dont.. .enjoy it.
when it comes to me, there's no such thing as a bad lay except if the person REALLY just... fails so hard.
and they just idk. -- kinda like if someone comes up with me with a strap-on and attempt to be sexy and waving it around
that's more comedic that sexy
*than
you were great, rachael
my room smells like the fish net stocking packaging wtf
yes they are very nice looking.
yes.
if i can, maybe i'll take pics with them on. not sure how cause it's awkward to take a pic of my legs in a good angle.
i dont have a hand held mirror.
or a full body mirror
just like... a head shot type of mirror
actually jade.
this is the exact fish net stockings i got today
i just need a garter belt cause it does start rolling up if i start walking
they are. i love them.
not sure when i'll ever WEAR them but still nice!