tbh i thought the amount of fic i'd consider saving would be MUCH SMALLER aaahh

i'm taking an axe to my lj after this so it is imperative i pick things out well

skimming my fic has been an eye opening experience!! I think I have defs improved from like. 2008-09ish.

basically i write either 1. porn or 2. character studies on aspects of characters NO1CURR ABOUT BUT MEEE

i should get a real editor friend or some such if i have any writing aspirations in the future

even for fanfic it would be nice just to develop better habits

like i think my prose has always been really conversational in a way that is a bit witty and easy to read but perhaps tonally inappt

also i think i write a bit dry when i'm not trying to be funny

i think i need to be either more bombastic or more direct

when i write exploration pieces like the spn thing or the hazel thing it's mostly me going I AM DRAWING ATTENTION TO SOMETHING I LIKE

PLEASE LIKE IT TOO

but my porn gets a lot more responses for obvious reasons

the former is much much harder for me to write but viscerally more satisfying-- i am secondarily a character study ficcer i guess

"well i want people to understand what i see in this" and so I write stuff like an examination of tres/caterina or peter/nafan

which can be summed up, respectively, as "ROBOT KNIGHT AND TUBERCULOSIS QUEEEEN ROMANSU" and "BROTHER LOVIN"

and then i dip into slightly more demanding ideas like

the hazel fic i wrote for an exchange which i wanted to do because i love hazel and i loved hazel&gat and i wanted to like

reconcile the loss he felt with the future he was given

but i don't consider ways in which you could, say, bring gat back for a happier story

by the same mechanics that i write a lot of drunkish m/m fic when i can't really see one of the parties deciding coherently to

bone someone of the same sex-- writing wise i am more prone to work under given conditions vs made up ones

because i don't fanfiction to rectify, i do it to make me feel better c':

or to examine an attitude in a way that brings me personal closure

like esp with that one heroes fic where regular nathan meets PUNK ROCK PETER-- that is me distorting a set of circumstances basically

to point at it and go LOOK THEY LOVE EACH OTHER NO MATTER WHAT.....BITCHES

Basically I am wish fulfillment as fuqqq.

the longest and most well known story I've written so far as the glee fic in which the characterisation was dubious as hell

but I'D ALREADY COMMITTED, BY GOD

and there you can also see my inclination towards romantic humor

with a really light and graceless touch of ~About Relationships~

lately i've found a happy medium though i think? conceptually? like i haven't 'published' anything in awhile except for that holic fic

and that wasn't plain porn, which has the tendency to almost bore me rn, it was also a story about ~~Feelings~~

and how physicality is a clumsy conduit for people's complexities

and that i think is my number one approach to fic writing, since i am v much a Relationships/Individual Persons writer

and admittedly not one for high-concept plotting

like... do i like nolanverse joker/harvey? THE THINGS I COULD SAY. Do I want to porn them. Not really because 1. ew the joker's teeth

and 2. i'd be doing my feelings about the subject a disservice if i just wrote about dicking or whatever

since my interest in joker/two-face in the nolan universe is directly linked to my feelings about hdent, my favorite character,

and the nuances of his fall from knighthood

but the best way to get readership is point blank to make an interesting and very physical piece (BOW CHICKA WOW) where they can still

tab out going OH WOWZERS THAT CHARACTERIZATION

and tbh that is something i want to do-- not like, for the sake of accumulating an audience but to attain that readable balance

between "so cerebral as to be quite dull" and "BURNING HOT TAMALES"

because that is what bar none my favorite fandom authors have done-- res from hp fandom being a very particular example

the interesting thing too though is that if i don't incorporate these themes into a larger overarching plot

(in layman's terms: instead of harvey meeting the joker for dinner and having really gross sexual tension, why aren't they also

robbing a bank before and afterwards)

then while my technique is improving, i still haven't really tried to expand my range over the past several years

which is probably a bad thing if I ever wanted to publish anything more valuable than pornos.