I feel empty right now, as if I have no soul yet I still feel pain in my heart. It hurts

I thought I was over him but the thought of having to know that I will see him in class slaps me in the face so hard.

I never been in a relationship, what we had was never even a relationship.

He lied, he said he was not looking for one yet he already trying to commit to someone.

What happen to me.him...us.

I'm such a fool. Letting him get to me like that I knew I should have kept my guard up since the beginning.

But he tricked me,pressured me. I learn what to do and not to do in a relationship but I didn't bother

I knew he was going to be my bf, the first one I ever had. And I didn't want anything to interfere with my goal. I wanted him

But that was selfish of myself

I didn't care what he wanted but hat I wanted most of all.

Having with him made me happy. I didn't feel lonely as usual

I evenn gave up some things to have him,anime,manga,Jesus.. yes Those things I've loved or could have helped me

I didn't care if I had to give my virginity to him. I wanted to male sure that he will stay with me forever.

I didn't want to feel alone as I have always been.

People may seem I'm happy go lucky self but in reality I'm only like that because I'm with people I like being around with.

In reality, I'm alone.

I don't have many friends

I'm kinda boring

Nothing good about me.

I'm ugly.

Sometimes, I do want to end my life.

Tried of feeling this emptiness inside me.

I have attempted suicide a couple of times, but never got through it.

I wonder if people even care if I'm gone.

Nope

-sigh-

I do wanna go out and have fun but things are keeping me back.

....yea soo I'm done now.

Don't bothering replying. I just needed to get it off my mind