-is inside of his house, playing with Kumajiro-
*rings the doorbell*
-Wonders who could be... Maybe it's a neighbor without heating, so runs to the door, opens... And freezes-
Matthieu... *extends the bouquet at him*
-Decides to focus on the roses so he doesn't have to look at Francis- Uhm... -Takes the bouquet and keeps staring it-
.... can I come in? *can feel the tension in the air*
Sure, it's freezing outside after all -Goes to the kitchen for a vase-
*sits in the sofa and tries to remember what he wanted to say to start the conversation but he can't so he'll probably just improvise*
Do you want coffee? -asks from the kitchen, too afraid and nervous to come back yet to the sitting room-
Yes please ! *looks around trying to spot the polar bear*
-Kumajiro walks from the bedroom to the kitchen 'cause he wants more maple syrup and spots Francis in the sitting room, so waves to him-
*waves back happy to see a sincere welcoming gesture in that house* Hey, Kumajiro, come here~
Do you have maple? -asks while comes closer-
Non, but your owner does.. why don't you ask him for some?
I'm going -turns around to go-
*chuckles amused*
-Finishes the coffee and gives Kumaboshi another bottle of maple, then comes back- Here.
-Puts the coffee on the table and then sits in other sofa with a cup of tea, sipping it and not looking at him yet-
*receives his cup of coffee and sips some too* It's really good.... you always make it the way I like it.
-Tenses and tries to cover his love for pleasing Francis- ... Oh, I didn't know. Thank you. -sips more tea-
*smiles* So..... how have you been?
I've been better. -Taps his fingers on his cup and keeps looking down while crosses his legs- What about you?
ah..better...*sighs and looks down like the floor was suddenly very interesting* I've been ...fine. But it's not the same.
How so? -sips again-
You're not there anymore. You know what I mean?
-Looks at him and stares, wanting him to keep talking-
I miss you, Canada. We haven't had the opportunity to talk about what happened.
-Feels even worst by being called like that, but sighs and nods- Fine. I told you last time I couldn't talk in that moment, but I think I --
can now.
*sips more coffee wondering what would be the correct words to start* First of all, I want to know what did England tell you
He told me what you did to him, phisically talking.
Be more specific
You know what happened, why do you want me to say it again? To rub it on my face? -sips more tea-
*frowns* Of course not! It's because I don't trust in that bloody rosbif! I'm sure he exagerated in lot of things.
I don't think he did. Actually, he was nervous, so I don't know if he told me everything or not.
You obviously don't know him as much as I do. *drinks the rest of his coffee*
-Gives him a quick glance and gets up- I'll go for more tea and cookies, do you want a refill?
......... are you avoiding the subject? *handles him his cup*
I'm not, but I think it's going to last a bit more at least, so you might want another cup.
Okay.... I appreciate the fact that you're open to have this.. conversation. So, thankyou, I want some cookies too.
-Goes to the kitchen and pulls of his hair 'cause his too nervous about all of this, but then breaths in and fills the cups-
*judges the carpet*
-Comes back with the cups and a plate of danish cookies-
*takes a cookie and eats it, remaining silent because feels like he has been interrupted*
-Sits again and sips his tea- You felt him, you kissed him.
... *sighs and looks away* I still don't know how it happened.
At least be sincere -takes a cookie and bites it-
What do you want me to say, Canada? *glances*
What's on your mind.
I'm here for a reason. I don't want to let this go so easily. It took us so much to be there. And because I kissed England... *sighs*
You're the one who let it go easily. You said you know how Arthur is, then why did you think he would just shut up and let it go?
It's because no matter what happens between us, in the end we'll always try to destroy each other. And yet, I still don't know why I did it.
-finishes his cookie and sips his tea again- It just *happened*?
There's a lot going on between me and England, all the time. You should know it by now.
... -bites his lips trying to find words not so harsh... He ends nodding-
I love you, Canada. What happened with England was a mistake, but then, we are always making mistakes and sabotaging each other.
You are different from him. *eats another cookie*
When Arthur told me what happened, I told him I didn't believe him, because I trusted you. So now, even if I forgive you, how can I --
-- trust you again? I mean, how can there be a relationship without trust from my side at least?
And I don't know in which way I'm different for you, I don't believe I'm special as you say.
I can't force you to trust me. I know myself enough, to be sure that controlling my instincts is something too hard for me to do.
I can try, but I am not strong enough.But it's because you're so special to me, that no matter what, my heart will always be for you.
*leaves his cup on the coffee table*
-stares the wall- Once I heard that if you got two loves, then you should be with the second, 'cause there's a reason why you didnt'--
--choose to be just with the first one.
...... do you think I love England? Is that what you are saying?
I don't know, but if there's no apparent reason, what do you want me to believe?
God, Matthieu! England and I have been this way for CENTURIES! It's not love, it's a relationship that no matter what remains unbreakable.
But I DO love you. I chose to love you and to be with you
*is looking directly at him to emphazise how serious his words are*
... Sorry -whispers-
Don't say you are sorry. *sighs and looks down again* I'm the one in fault.
-Decides to look up at him now, examining- ... When did you chose to love me and be by my side?
*blinks* I don't know... I've always loved you though, but it was in a different way. In one moment that love mutated into something else
But I'm not sure when it happened, maybe when a bit before I asked you to go out with me... *laughs*
-smiles softly- I see... Way later than I.
*feels flattered but guilty at the same time* I didn't know you had an interest before I asked you...
I had an interest years before that -laughs softly, not looking at him, but with a dreamy expression-
*smiles too* I had no idea... and I usually have a sixth instinct for that sort of things
I'm invisible for every sixth instinct, son don't worry.
*pouts* My bad. I'm sorry. But I'd love to hear your story...
-keeps the dreamy expression while looks to the ceiling and hugs his legs- I thought of you every day of my life after I became Arthur's--
--colony. You were everything back then and I missed you, so I'd think of you every day.
But if you want a better and concrete answer, I started loving you when Alfred became independent.
I thought of you too Canada, it's difficult when your kid leaves, but it's harder when he's taken away from you by your worst enemy.
*is suddenly very interested* Alfred's independence was a long time ago... and why specifically then?
Because you were there. You came to help him, you helped because you wanted to bother England too, but you didn't come for me.
And I... That's why I helped Arthur. I was angry, I was sad, I envied my brother too much, because you came for him and not for me.
And I hated myself for feeling like that towards him. I wanted him to get free, but knowing you helped made me regret.
I think in that moment I discovered you meant too much for me that I even imagined.
Canada, you didn't even try to get independent... I thought with time you learned to accept him as your protector.
After all, you have spent more time with him than with me.
If you have asked me to help you with your independence, things would have been different.
But at that time, the relationship between us was too cold and distant, am I right?
You're right, our relationship wasn't the best either. I mean, we didn't talk for centuries -sad and distant look-
Things were different. I'm not like my brother, as much as I'd like. People wouldn't step on me easily.
You know people of Quebec acknowleged him as the ruler, but not as the definitively owner. Anyway... -sighs-
Don't mind me -chuckles-
*moves to get closer to him* I knew Quebec would not let go my heritage so easily... but you're saying he also recognized me as the owner?
-Sips his tea- You will always be the original owner. Nothing will change that.
I wonder why, I wasn't even the first to discover you...
Because you didn't forget -looks at him and finally smiles softly-
*blushes* Even we we didn't see or talk to each other, I never forgot about you
How would I forget you? You were and are the center of my world.
*holds his breath and look at him surprised*
-Blushes and gets up, very nervous- I'll go for more tea...
*stands up too and grabs his wrist* Am I the center of your world? Thats--- a big confession
-Looks down, because that obviously is going to hide his blush- Uh, yeah -mumbles-
How did that happen? *tightens the grip*
Since forever? You're my light... And I have to go for the tea before it gets cold.
*releases the grip* Okay...*smiles* I have some tea too
-Runs to the kitchen for the tea-
*sighs, sits down and stares out of the window, lots of things going on in his mind*
-drinking a bit of vodka just in case-
*is feeling lots of burtterflies in his stomach*
-pours tea in two cups and comes back, still nervous-
*pats on the spot next to him in the couch*
-Gives him his cup and sits down where he patted, gulping a lot of his tea in the process-
*leaves his cup on the coffee table and puts a hand on his knee* take it easy! *chuckles*
Okay... -Leaves his cup on the coffee table too, looking to other direction-
*runs his hand through his leg* Matthieu.. look at me
-turns to look at him-
*cups his face with his hands and kisses him*
-Lays his hands on top of his and kisses back softly, needing him, but still unsure of this-
*moves his hands lower to hold him by the waist, pulling him closer, and deepens the kiss*
-Lets him for a while, enjoying the kiss too and circling his neck... But then breaks it and stares him-
Lapin? *strokes his hair softly pulling a hair bang*
I need to be sure. I need to be sure of your love for me.
I think there's only one way you can be sure
How?
Time... *leans to leave a trail of kisses in his neck*
And what's my guarantee for now? -strokes his hair-
*chuckles* Matthieu, there are not guarantees in love..
I jumped off the cliff, but right now I don't feel like you'd be there to catch me -whispers in his ear, kissing his jaw- Teach me again.
To believe you.
*sighs* Okay.... *grabs his shoulders and kisses him fully on the lips* Then I guess I'd go home now....
Why? -feels sad now, gripping his shoulder-
I don't want to pressure you. I'll go home now, and I'll take you on a date tomorrow. Do you want to have dinner or watch a movie together?
-Sighs and leans to rest his head on the crook of his neck, nuzzling- A dinner would be nice...
*hugs* A dinner will be.
Can we stay like this for a while more? I feel like if you go out of that door right now I'll suspect everything was a dream.
*holds him closer , cuddling* I don't want to leave either, you know?
Hmm... -nods and sighs- ... Thank you for the roses.
I'm glad you liked them. *makes him sit on his lap*
-leans on his chest- I loved them deeply.
As much as you love me? *teases*
-Kisses his beard- I think they have to invent a number higher than infinite to put there my love for you.
*laughs and cuddles more* But then my love for you would be a number higher...
Of course not -cuddles too- Mine is higher.
*nuzzles* I'll show you mine is higher. *tickles*
Non! -laughs a lot and tries to break free- S-S'il vous plait!
*laughs too and tickles more* But you seem to enjoy it! Why should I stop?
-starts tickling him- Who s-says I'm enjoying? -laughs anyway-
*laughs more and tries to push his hands away* No no no, arrêterez! *starts tearing a little because he's laughing too much*
-Keeps attacking- But you seem to enjoy it! -smiles widely-
I don't! You're playing dirty! *hugs his stomach and bends down laughing and crying a little*
-Laughs more 'cause his breath tickled him there too- H-Hey!
*tries to catch his breath but keeps giggling* I love you...!
-strokes his hair catching his breath- ... Je t'aime plus.
*purrs and closes his eyes enjoying the caresses*
-Leans to kiss his head- Quoi, est ce que tu est un petit chaton maintenant?