quickly reaches for his phone when he hears it go off. He feels his stomach jump into his throat when he sees who it's from, and for a quick

second he's afraid to read the rest. It takes him a few tries to read it, his mind automatically looking for key words and not seeing any,

but ultimately a smile creeps onto his face. That's good, right? Though Kiku *would* be the type to give bad news in the guise of pleasant

formalities...

responds that he's on his way, without so much as a glance at the clock to SEE IF HE EVEN CAN. He grabs his coat and heads out immediately.

does not text back, and instead begins preparing tea and some light snacks. He glances over at his kotatsu and has to stop himself from

smiling.

((HE WOULD TRY TO BE STOIC, EVEN WHEN ALONE. REALLY, KIKU?))

((IT'S PRACTICE.))

arrives at Kiku's door sometime later, but stands outside for a moment before taking any action. He tells himself that this might not end

the way he wants it to, and he needs to be prepared from that. He closes his eyes, inhales and exhales deeply, and knocks on the door.

hurries to answer the door, wiping his hands on his apron before he pauses, looking down in horror. He was still wearing his apron. He

pulled it over his head and quickly flings it to the side, hoping it is properly out of sight before he walks to the door, his stride

deliberately calm. He turns the doorknob with a sweaty palm, inhales slowly, and slowly pulls the door open, cringing internally at how

badly it creaked. He cursed himself for not getting it fixed before now and plastered on a large smile. "Niisa- ...Yao. Good afternoon." He

.

actually looks a little openly surprised when Kiku calls him by his name, but this warps into a smile so big it makes him feel just a little

silly. "Good afternoon! He beams right back, quickly coming in out of the cold. (He can chalk his red face up to that, as well.) "How have

you been?" he makes a quick attempt at conversation as he slides his coat off.

takes his coat and hangs it up, thinking about the question. "I have been...well," He muses.

didn't really expect any other answer from him, but it's SOMEthing to initiate conversation, dammit. He nods as he walks further into the

house, taking in a deep breath; it's been a long time since he's been over to see Kiku--too long, and he gladly takes it in. "Have you been

busy?" he asks, but then quickly his expression turns into panic (it's a good thing Kiku is behind him) as he realizes WHAT HE SHOULD

ACTUALLY BE DOING RIGHT NOW...

follows after him, shaking his head. "No, I have not," He murmurs. "N-Yao...I have made tea and snacks. W...would you like to, ah...sit at

the k-kotatsu with me?" He asks, his face burning. He finds himself unable to meet China's eyes and he stares at the ground in embarassment.

((Ohay I just got on as you were posting this hurr))

"I-it's just cold out, that's all." He explains quickly, turning even redder as he turns to busy himself with the alignment of a picture

frame against the wall.

((LAWL))

quickly distracted from his brief moment of panic, glancing over his shoulder before turning around to face him. When Kiku is pointedly

avoiding looking at him, he has a quick twinge of doubt, but then he realizes that Kiku is probably just as nervous as he is. (It is still

strange, he has to note, in contrast to the last time they saw each other.) So he smiles, and gives a quiet laugh, and he heads to the

kotatsu. "It is quite cold, isn't it?"

a bit dizzy from all the blood rushing to his head, but nods for a moment before he realizes that China can't see him. "...yes." He says

quietly, and goes to retrieve the plate of edamame and tea. He takes a deep, shaky breath before walking back into the living room and

setting the plate on the kotatsu and sitting down. He took extra care in arranging his legs underneath the kotatsu before turning to look

at China. "So...how have you been?" He asks, his voice soft.

smiles as he watches him, just the tiniest bit amused by how carefully he seems to sit. He turns his attention to the question as he reaches

for the tea. While his first reaction to this is usually to complain about how busy he is, he actually stops to consider it. "I've been...

all right. Anxious." he adds with a sad smile down at his tea.

"Anxious?" Kiku repeats, adding a questioning lilt to the word. He reaches for his own tea.

turns his eyes back up to Kiku, though the weak smile remains, and he forces a bit of a laugh. "...I was...worried that...I wouldn't hear

from you."

of how he was almost too nervous to contact the other man at all, and wisely decides not to mention this. "I was worried that...you would

no longer be...interested..." He mutters, his expression devolving from its usual cool look to reveal his inner tension for a beat before

he regained his composure. He reaches for some edamame, moving too quickly for it to be obvious his hand was shaking. He stuffed the food in

his mouth and chewed slowly.

looks completely and unashamedly taken aback for a moment. Slowly his expression morphs back into a smile, painful at best, and he makes a

quick call on how much of what he's thinking he should actually articulate as he reaches across the surface of the kotatsu to boldly place a

hand on the side of Kiku's face. "I am far, far beyond the point of changing my mind, Kiku. I would have spared myself a lot of pain if I

could simply walk away."

tries not to jerk back from the shock of being touched with only moderate success. His face grows warm and he takes a large gulp of tea,

the scalding heat a welcome distraction. It takes him a moment to actually process the words he's hearing, and when it finally filters

through to his mind, his demeanor sobers and he clears his throat. "I...I see," he says, his voice stiff.

((GAH, I SAID THAT WORD AGAIN. I CAN'T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY.))

((WELL IT'S A GOOT THING HE'S SITTING DOWN--/SHOT))

((XDDD *dies* AGREED))

furrows his brow at this reaction--both to the touch and to his words--and sinks back down to his own side. Even after everything that

happened that day, nothing has really changed, he thinks to himself. He still doesn't want to be touched, and he still closes up at any sign

of actual feelings. Why did Kiku even invite him over, he asks himself bitterly, if he's just going to be polite or stoic and nothing in

between, just like always? He's only vaguely aware that, as he's having this conversation with himself, he's burning a hole in the floor

beside him with a pouting glare as if somebody just told him he can't have a puppy.

The gentle susurrus of shifting fabric is the only sign that Kiku has moved before warm arms wrap around the lithe form of the other man.

"I am sorry," he murmurs quietly into China's silky black hair with a sigh. "I did not mean...I am trying. It is...hard for me."

((HARD, IS IT? /shotsohard))

immediately widens his eyes when he feels this, and his face starts to burn when he realizes what's happening. He doesn't pull away, though,

and he slowly closes his eyes as a faint smile forms on his face. He takes in a deep breath, basking in the scent of Kiku, and lifts a hand

to touch the man's arm. "I know. It's hard for me, too, in my way. I...I worry, you know? That I'll annoy you, and..." he shrugs slowly,

leaning in closer to Kiku.

sits there in silence for a moment, leaning against China as much as the other man is leaning against him. "It seems that we both have more

to learn," he says quietly. His fingers curl around China's slim hand and squeeze lightly.

comforted by his actions, but the words concern him a little. Is that a simple statement of a fact they both have to admit is true, or is he

having second thoughts? Sure, they have some things to work out... Okay, a LOT of things... But they had to know that coming into this,

right? Maybe he's jumping to conclusions... But what if he's not? He slides his eyes half-open and stares down at the floor for a long

moment of silence, before he finally decides, well...what does he have to lose, at this point? He leans his head back and lifts a hand to

tilt Kiku's face towards his own, catching his lips softly (but if he gets shy and tries to pull back, he won't let him without a fight).

((SPIDER-MAN KISS? /bricked))

((XD HE IS NOT LEANING *THAT* FAR BACK))

((IF ONLY, IF ONLY, THE WOODPECKER CRIES...))

((...or sighs, I can never remember.))

(("IT'S COOL THIS IS HOW WE DO IT IN CHINA. WE LOVE TOM CRUISE AND SPIDERMAN.")

((...Ihateyouface))

((XDDDD))

melts into the kiss, trying not to be embarassed by his instantaneous reaction. "Y-yao," he whispers softly.

slowly pulls away, just barely. He keeps his eyes closed for a moment before leaning his head back against Kiku's shoulder and looking up at

him with a smile. "We'll figure it out," he says simply, content with just that.

a small smile of his own in response. "That would...make me happy."