Villain
6 months ago
Okay we watched Secret Level. It's pretty bad but there's some gems
latest #188
Villain
6 months ago
So here's my ranking
Villain
6 months ago
from worst to best
Villain
6 months ago
15 epsidoes
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Villain
6 months ago
15: New World
Villain
6 months ago
I'll be honest we just
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
it says something about the second batch of episodes that this is the takeaway because I feel like we came out of it semi-begrudgingly going "Secret Level is kinda good" last night
Villain
6 months ago
yeah
Villain
6 months ago
were collectively SO disinterested in a short based on Amazon's disastrous MMO
Villain
6 months ago
that we just didn't watch it
Villain
6 months ago
fuck it
Villain
6 months ago
14: Playstation
Villain
6 months ago
That's right, there's one short that's just
Villain
6 months ago
for Playstation, as a concept
Villain
6 months ago
It was the most cringe thing I have ever seen
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
I was furious with this one
Villain
6 months ago
Like, you know how sometimes games will have trailers for the co-op experience where the players are talking to each other in ways that are supposed to sound natural but its' the most awkward and stilted conversation you have had in your LIFE?
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
Morally repellent
Villain
6 months ago
The entire thing sounded like that
Villain
6 months ago
I hated this
Villain
6 months ago
13: Exodus
Villain
6 months ago
This is an episode for a game that isn't coming out until 2026 that I have never heard of
Villain
6 months ago
Conceptually it's solid, I guess?
Villain
6 months ago
A father is chasing after his daughter across space but because of relativity she is aging faster than he is
Villain
6 months ago
I have never heard of the game but I guess it's made by ex Bioware employees
Villain
6 months ago
It was boring and like 2/3rds of the plot were dumped on us by a narrator
Villain
6 months ago
Didn't have time to breathe. Boring
Villain
6 months ago
12: Crossfire
Villain
6 months ago
We actually had to look this up because none of us had heard of it
Villain
6 months ago
Apparently it's a super popular military multiplayer FPS
Villain
6 months ago
The short was just like
Villain
6 months ago
A Tom Clancy adventure
Villain
6 months ago
two teams of shady mercenaries fighting over a Package in the modern day
Villain
6 months ago
They had a kind of fun thing going on where both sides kept saying shit like "Hey, we're the good guys, right?'
Villain
6 months ago
"Let's go stop the bad guys"
Villain
6 months ago
"It's fine, we're the good guys"
Villain
6 months ago
Which added an almost interesting vibe to the whole thing
Villain
6 months ago
11: Megaman
Villain
6 months ago
This could have scored a LOT higher
Villain
6 months ago
if it wasn't the shortest short in the whole collection
Villain
6 months ago
it was like 3-4 minutes long
Villain
6 months ago
What we saw was reasonably entertaining but it just had no substance to it
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
It felt like not a small amount of cowardice that the most cartoony ones were so short
Villain
6 months ago
Megaman wants to fight but Dr Light won't let him but then Megaman reveals he can resist Dr. Wily's infection
Villain
6 months ago
So he goes off to have ADVENTURES
Villain
6 months ago
the end
Villain
6 months ago
10: Concord
Villain
6 months ago
Okay so like
Villain
6 months ago
if you had just showed me this short as it's own thing
Villain
6 months ago
I wouldn't have hated it
Villain
6 months ago
Some goofy space outlaws have an adventure with betrayals and gunfights
Villain
6 months ago
There's some legit good moment
Villain
6 months ago
but UNFORTUNATELY
連続犬
6 months ago
As a certified Megahead I'm like, genuinely kinda floored that the entire short is just "the backstory of megaman, as a franchise"
連続犬
6 months ago
like that is just literally The Setup
Villain
6 months ago
I know that it's based on a game that got canceled like 2 weeks after it came out so it will never happen
Villain
6 months ago
svensational: IT WAS SO NOTHING
連続犬
6 months ago
and this is probably fanon mixing with canon but if I remember right it's not that Megaman can RESIST the infection, it's literally that Wily DIDN'T BOTHER infecting him
連続犬
6 months ago
because he's a lab assistant!
連続犬
6 months ago
He has no weapons!
Villain
6 months ago
No Wily had like
Villain
6 months ago
little bug bots that could infect things
連続犬
6 months ago
That is a weird diversion
Villain
6 months ago
it infected...bomb man?
連続犬
6 months ago
I'll allow it
Villain
6 months ago
some robot in Light's lab
Villain
6 months ago
Megaman had to fight it
連続犬
6 months ago
was he really big or did he throw explosives
Villain
6 months ago
both
連続犬
6 months ago
that feels like they combined Guts and Bomb then which is a wild take
Villain
6 months ago
連続犬
6 months ago
anyway point is, terrible, awful
Villain
6 months ago
9: Dungeons and Dragons
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
I did, not knowing Bomb Man,
Villain
6 months ago
This is the first one that I wasn't disappointed by
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
think it was Guts Man until they said the name
Villain
6 months ago
A group of adventurers have an adventure
Villain
6 months ago
It's exactly what it needed to be
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
I wanted to type Gutsman SO BAD
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
because of the cartoon
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
the old cartoon I mean
Villain
6 months ago
There's a paladin that's a seven foot goliath lady with scars all over her face
Villain
6 months ago
There's a halfling wizard who fights al ich
Villain
6 months ago
there's a dragon
Quinn Angstrom
6 months ago
was there a dungeon?
Villain
6 months ago
8: Honor of Kings
Villain
6 months ago
quinn2win: sort of
Villain
6 months ago
The dragon lives in a big cave that they had to cast a spell to get into
Villain
6 months ago
but most of the action took place outside
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
It was tough for me not to look at that short like "but the movie exists"
belatedly: yeah sven is right. wily didn't bother because rock was just a lab assistant so who cares. light had to totally remodel rock.
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
which isn't the short's fault
Villain
6 months ago
anyway I had never heard of Honor of Kings before but apparently it's a Chinese MOBA?
oh i'm scary
6 months ago
I think they break the main kid out of a dungeon?
Villain
6 months ago
yurisoldier: it wasn't a dungeon they found him in a cage at a camp outdoors
Villain
6 months ago
ANYWAY Honor of Kings was about a city that is controlled by like a fantasy AI thing
Villain
6 months ago
but the AI is going crazy so a guy goes in to the core to have a battle of wits with the AI
Villain
6 months ago
And they talk about predestination a bunch
Villain
6 months ago
Visually it was fuckin' nuts
Villain
6 months ago
I liked it reasonably well despite not knowing the source material
Villain
6 months ago
7: Sifu
Villain
6 months ago
This was a short one
Villain
6 months ago
but like
Villain
6 months ago
it did what it needed to do really well
Villain
6 months ago
Kung Fu guy fights a bunch of badguys and dies several times, getting up older each time
Villain
6 months ago
But it had a really good set of bookends
Villain
6 months ago
where at the start he's eating snacks from a little old chinese lady at a food stand who says that her food is so good because she put 60 years of experience in it
Villain
6 months ago
Then at the end he comes back as an old man
Villain
6 months ago
and is like
Villain
6 months ago
"My..."grandson" said that your food is the best because you put 60 years of experience in it"
Villain
6 months ago
And he's aged about 60 years
Villain
6 months ago
It was a real poignant moment
Villain
6 months ago
6: Armored Core
Villain
6 months ago
Keanu Reeves was in this one
Villain
6 months ago
As a fucking disaster of a man who's an unstoppable AC pilot
Villain
6 months ago
it was cool
Villain
6 months ago
I don't really have a lot to say about this one
Villain
6 months ago
5: Warhammer 40,000
Villain
6 months ago
As a story this one was kinda nothing
Villain
6 months ago
The heroic space marines need to go to a place and kill some guys
Villain
6 months ago
but then evil chaos cultists try to stop them
Villain
6 months ago
But like
Villain
6 months ago
the vibes were immaculate
Villain
6 months ago
The whole thing had an almost dreamlike quality to it that got stronger and strong as the marines marched further and further into magic bullshit
Villain
6 months ago
At the start they were obliterating everything effortlessly
Villain
6 months ago
by the end they were having screaming vision quests as daemons ripped at their brains
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
Especially after we had so many shorts with narration, I really appreciated how much of the Warhammer one was dead quiet
Villain
6 months ago
Yeah
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
No conversation, just spectacular visual language
Villain
6 months ago
I want to watch it again
Villain
6 months ago
4: Outer Worlds
Villain
6 months ago
This was
Villain
6 months ago
SO bleak
Villain
6 months ago
As, I understand, is the game
Villain
6 months ago
A boy is in love with a girl, but he works at a shit job as a garbage inspector or something while the girl got a job as a scientist
Villain
6 months ago
So he gets a new job as a test subject just to be with her again
Villain
6 months ago
While being tested over and over again until he's lost all his limbs and is like 80% cyborg
Villain
6 months ago
Only to find out that she's got ambitions beyond him
Villain
6 months ago
I recognize that it was really good but after it was done I just sat there for a minute going "fuck..."
Villain
6 months ago
3: Spelunky
Villain
6 months ago
It was cute
Villain
6 months ago
A mother daughter pair have been challenging the temple over and over again
Villain
6 months ago
and dying over and over again
Villain
6 months ago
after a while the deaths start to get to them, but then the mom reminds her that it's not just deaths but also ADVENTURES
Villain
6 months ago
The whole speech is like
Villain
6 months ago
a heartfelt tribute to the entire roguelike genre
Villain
6 months ago
https://images.plurk.com/55qOuI4z247C6L0RX1EXB6.jpg she was the daughter
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
it was really delightful, even not knowing spelunky
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
I actually really loved how that episode let its bleakness sit rather than just make a joke about it like the game often does
Villain
6 months ago
yeah
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
*The Outer Worlds episode
Villain
6 months ago
yeah
Villain
6 months ago
2: Unreal Tournament
Villain
6 months ago
This one took me by surprise
Villain
6 months ago
I did NOT expect to give half a fuck about Unreal Tournament
Villain
6 months ago
But what I got was like
Villain
6 months ago
the story of a mining robot taking so much abuse from its human handlers that it develops free will
Villain
6 months ago
And it leads a bloody uprising
Villain
6 months ago
It involves arena fights
Villain
6 months ago
Where an announcer says shit like "FIRST BLOOD"
Villain
6 months ago
"MULTI KILL"
Villain
6 months ago
"UNSTOPPABLE"
Villain
6 months ago
"DOMINATION"
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
It REALLY swung for the fences
Villain
6 months ago
AND NUMBER ONE
Villain
6 months ago
1: PAC-MAN
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
HUMANITY'S GREATEST VILLAIN
Villain
6 months ago
Survival Horror Pac-Man
Villain
6 months ago
You must be hungry
Villain
6 months ago
There is strength in repetition
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
There is strength in repetition
Niamh Vibes
6 months ago
I think so much of it is carried by Puck's vocal delivery
Villain
6 months ago
Word ONE you're like
Villain
6 months ago
"Oh this yellow circle is UP to some shit"
Villain
6 months ago
Anyway my opinion
Villain
6 months ago
is that everything 9 and up on this list
Villain
6 months ago
is something you could watch without hating yourself
Villain
6 months ago
I think my favorite small moment in the WH40k one was when they started getting into the magic shit
Villain
6 months ago
and all the purity seals
Villain
6 months ago
those little paper prayers affixed to their armor with wax
Villain
6 months ago
just
Villain
6 months ago
caught fire
Villain
6 months ago
a quiet moment of "oh this is gonna get fucked"
Rama
6 months ago
The Outer Worlds one is interesting since it's a riff on one of your party member's parents' backstory from the game.
Rama
6 months ago
Parvati's dad did not follow his scientist wife on her promotion path and wound up dying penniless of malnutrition in the starting town, but he did at least get to raise his daughter.
連続犬
6 months ago
Belatedly but yeah, the Outer Worlds is pretty much Black Comedy about the nature of unrestrained capitalism
連続犬
6 months ago
The fact this let it sit is in fact really neat
ProfessorGustav
6 months ago
I have a theory that secret levels is actively better if you know less about some of the canons involved, bcuz I actively felt my enjoyment of king failson ahnold dry up the more I learned about the origin game
Villain
6 months ago
I can believe that
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