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ash: past 4/10, present 5, future 4

Past 11 and 12

Present 7

past 4: His parents are WASPs and he grew up in the 70s/80s, so, like. Why couldn't he just be normal. Dress normally. Act normally. Be a good son. It got worse as he got older and started really trying to explore and figure things out; by 1976ish it was regular screaming matches that always ended up with someone in tears.

past 10: As a kid she wanted to be an artist! ...but even before she went NC with her parents, the 'be a doctor or a lawyer or we're not paying for higher education' was very explicitly on the table starting at ~adolescence. She doesn't like law, and she's good at bio, so MEDICINE IT WAS.

She had a whole fifteen-year plan!! Reasonably detailed!! And then she died and was forced to drop out of school, so fuck her, apparently.

present 5: Outside the Barge... can't have bad friendships if you don't have friends. Burned all their bridges when they left London, have a reputation for betrayal + impulsivity + being deeply destructive, & being Camarilla Enemy Number 4 does not a great social life make. Mostly they chat with demons they summon when they're starved for interaction.

They do talk to other infernalists & occultists, but that's not 'allies', that's transactional. You do this for me, I do this for you, and we both agree not to fuck each other over about it.
You would think 'maybe they talk to their clanmates' -- haha no they kill those on sight. For different reasons!

She doesn't have anyone she really looks up to anymore; the last one was her mentor Moloch, and she ate his soul, so. No one you look up to is better than you are, or however it goes. Every mentor she's had is dead! Whoops! She only killed most of them, and sometimes not even on purpose.

future 4: They thought they'd be dead by now so?? That?? Didn't happen. Or that they'd have succeeded in their goal by now. But that was a stupid dream, with no sense of scope or scale, and they know better now. It'll take a while. If it works at all.

past 11: Had a brief + intense fear of the dark when she was 6 or so, but that's about it, really. She doesn't scare easy. Never has.

past 12: When Magnus asked her if she wanted to be a vampire, if she wanted to be like him, she should've said no.

present 7: She has an ex-gf! If that counts. Victoria Lyons, current Prince of London, formerly part of the London Inquisition alongside Ash. They were very sweet with each other for almost a year!

...and then Ash started spiraling, Vic broke up w/ him & established "I still care about you, but this isn't working", and he said things you should not say to someone you're still teammates with.
He never said goodbye. He's still in love with her, mostly. But it's a faded thing: some relic of someone he can't be anymore.

(& present 5, Barge Edition: not particularly social! has decided she likes Chase, Tendi, and Sokie in the way closest to friends that she has. T scares the shit out of her but Ash respects her, + fine with Ulla and Avalon but will not seek them out. & she gets on pretty well with Vincent, tho i don't think they talk much)