so, like, for me personally, I identify more with femininity than anything else than what is considered my gender and femininity shouldn't be assigned to one gender

bringing this up because a trans woman on TikTok talked about how trans misogyny is a hatred of anything feminine

I strongly believe that any gender can participate in femininity.

same

also same

and trans men that dabble in feminine aesthetics are still men

correct

and also a nonbinary or gender fluid person that was born female at birth and is feminine presenting is still nonbinary and trans

that's me lol

(trans, if they want to use that label. not all nonbinary people do)

i will rock a dress and makeup but i won't id as a woman. just a potato in a dress

hahaha mood

namang: very true!

feminine can be for anyone really

I'd say that it's probably the overwhelming opinion that femininity = woman/female, but it shouldn't be. presentation has nothing to do with gender.

exactly

anyone is allowed to participate in that aesthetic and it shouldn't be mutually exclusive to being a woman or girl

not at all. presentation and voice is irrelevant to gender, to the point where cis women get the brunt of transmisoginy as well (albeit at a massively lower scale than trans women, obviously, but it affects them nonetheless bc they're labeled as trans for not fitting a certain level of and standard of "feminity")

^

i think our relationship with feminity as a whole, in general, will always be complicated. just as complex as masculinity, with the addend brunt of trans-unfriendly voices overtaking this subject

I've always felt the femininity is about performance in relation to self identity. it's not identity in and of itself... if that makes sense

transmedicalism preaches that unless you transition you can't be trans and unless you over-perform your actual gender (zeroing in on opposing your AGAB), you're not actually trans: because they're scared of the experiences that trans women live everyday, specially trans women of color, by being women that dont fit into a white thin dainty hyper-feminine mold

the history of feminity as an expression of identity is a tale as old as humanity itself and it never had anything to do in gender until bioessentialism got really bad in the past like 1000 years

sorry this is a subject im passionate about but also scatter brained

nooo! it's okay!!

go off, by all means

:'3

thats p much all i had to say on the matter! i think letspositivethinking has a really good opinion on it too

because performance is often social and meant to be perceived and as such we personally can and should choose what our hearts say instead of what is expected of us. as a man i struggle with this very often but it gets easier to deal with eventually

aNYWAY tldr yeah feminity and masculinity have nothing to do with gender, it has everything to do with how you choose to express an ASPECT of yourself and most people have both in bounds and thats okay. we'd live in a much happier world if everyone understood this

absolutely agreed!!

I have a shirt that says “femme but still them “ hahaha

the older I think about this, sometimes I don't feel 100% attached to identity of a woman... but as neither or something else. definitely nothing masculine

I only feel absolutely attached to feminine and hyper feminine image

haurchefant: omg my nonbinary friend would love that

yeah i'm bigender and one of the genders i perpetually "am", is none. like i am a man but also nothing. no gender jenkins.

I feel that so much lol. and this stuff I've been like shrugging off for years but today it got me thinking how I dressed masculine as a kid and I didn't really care if someone saw me as a boy

i think for some people socialized as women they're taught to disregard any "gender confusion" in favor of forcing them fulfill certain roles

seriously tho

you get forced all those gender norms so young and when you push back, you're told "well, that's not very lady-like"

or the classic "you'll change your mind"

oh nat are you me? i definitely feel the same way. like i def have zero interest in the idea of masculinity

but older i get the more im like... i don't care much for being a woman? i want to be nothing

the way we limit ourselves and assign gender to color, clothing and it's just sad there is so much flavor and vibrancy. femininity is for everyone. masculinity is for everyone

recipeh: THIS

mollypocket: I was gonna repeat what I said above lol

recipeh: also does that make us fall into the category of gender fluid?

in my experience it could be, if you still ID as a woman sometimes and nothing sometimes, it def sounds like gender fluid or nonbinary woman to me (✓ bigender)

ooh thank you!